Do you struggle with chronic pain and/or illness? Do you find it hard to have a good relationship with your body because of it?
I was recently diagnosed with a fairly rare connective tissue disorder. While I was relieved to finally have an explanation for myriad inexplicable symptoms I’ve had my whole life, the diagnosis also opened up a whole world of testing, supplements, and alternative treatments which often highlighted my body’s limitations more than anything else.
Through this journey, which I know is just beginning, I have been grateful to have my own set of healing tools and practices to help keep me grounded in a deeper truth, maintain a loving relationship with my body (to the extent possible), and prevent me from spiraling into fear.
I send so much empathy to whatever health issues might have brought you here. And I hope the following suggestions might help you on your journey.
1. Access your Emotions
The first step is to allow whatever emotions might be there to arise. That may be fear, sadness, overwhelm, anger, powerlessness, confusion… Writing a list can be helpful. And then I invite you to say hello to each one by name.
2. Access Beliefs Being Triggered
Next, notice any beliefs that may have been triggered by your pain and/or condition, as well as your journey for getting support, if it’s relevant. For example “I’m all alone.” “Those in charge have no idea what they are doing.” “I’m so unlucky.” “Just when you think things are okay, disaster strikes…” Whatever it may be. Again, writing them down, and saying hello to each one can be helpful.
3. Trace the Beliefs to childhood.
Notice if the emotions and beliefs feel familiar. If they do, you might want to trace them back to your childhood. Imagine you are sending empathy to any young part of you that was developing those beliefs. If this feels highly emotionally charged and you want to go deeper into this work, this blog post (and YT video) might help: https://www.radiantwholenesshealing.com/healing-childhood-and-family-wounds/.
4. Connect to Your Body
When we are in pain, taking strong medications, and/or things are happening in our body we have no control over and might not understand, connecting to our bodies might feel difficult. Or terrifying. This is understandable. And yet, from my perspective it’s impossible to heal the body if we are not connected to it.
I invite you to sit or lie in a calm space. Close your eyes. And start feeling into areas of your body that feel tight, painful, and/or agitated. Take ten slow breaths (to the extent that’s accessible) in and out of the area. Imagine each breath is bringing compassion and care to the area.
As you drop in more deeply into your body, you might feel into the quality of the pain/discomfort. Ask yourself “if my body could communicate with me, what might it be trying to convey.”
5. Connect to Your Fear
For most people, wherever there is chronic pain/illness, there is fear (and if that’s not the case for you, you can skip this part). Although we said hi to all the emotions in #1, it can be helpful to spend extra time with the fear.
If possible, place one or both hands on any part of the body that feels like it’s needing attention (the heart and/or abdomen are often good places to start). If that is not physically possible, you can imagine it. Send care and compassion to the part of you that is scared. If you feel called to, you can say some reassuring words. “I know you’re scared. It’s okay to be scared. And you’re not alone.”
6. Connect to a Healthy Future Self
If it feels available to you in this moment, imagine a future of parallel version of yourself who is healthy. Imagine that you are stepping into that space with them. Let them know that you are a version of them that isn’t as healthy. Ask this future/parallel self for any message. Merge with them. Feel what it’s like in your body to be merged with them. Bring this feeling into the crown of your head, feel it spread through your neural pathways, and your whole body.
